Sunday 20 February 2011

Apathy

http://www.therecord.com/news/local/article/489999--two-uw-centres-closed-following-anti-female-messages

When my brain stops seething I will have more to write about this.
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brain is still seething but more because I am sick and in a constant state of disgruntlement and this whole issue is not helping my mood.

Anyways, this whole thing is a perfect example of my afore mentioned fear cycle and how it breeds ignorance and apathy and all sorts of nasty things habits. For instance the source of these threats and ignorant mass-media displays is clearly fearful of their apparent inferiority or... no, actually I think that sums it up quite nicely.

Something has obviously threatened this persons ego and standing in life and therefore they need to bring others down to improve their standing. Typical schoolyard bully tactics all grown up into full blown internal self-esteem problems turned external societal issue.

I mean technically it should have been a societal issue to begin with-- our kids need far better emotional stability in their lives in order to be functioning individuals and members of worthwhile wholes later on in life and clearly this person(these persons) didn't get that sort of thing. Not so shocking.

Right, so douche-type person(s) needs to be tracked down and psycho-analyzed so we all learn from this thing, then I don't care what you so with them as long as they are dealt with.

The Law on the other hand, is bloody ridiculous in trying to say that this prejudice against the entire female population is not a hate crime. What exactly do you mean? Because it doesn't give specifics on a legislative document you can't piece it together yourself?!

One more piece of evidence added to the mountain stacked up against how the system operates.

Go Canada.

Saturday 19 February 2011

Fear

"but that's the point, innit? you're still afraid, you're afraid that it won't be good enough or whatever. that's why you can't get started; you're still being controlled by a contrived emotion. let it go, write words, who cares how they sound? you can rewrite it later if it's shit, but just do it. write a word, that's not impossible. then write another one. don't be afraid of the words, they're just words, and they're yours."


Good point.


So recently I've been thinking about emotions. Fear isn't so much an emotion as it is a survival tool, and any tool held the right way can be used as a weapon (See WESTERN SOCIETY). So much runs off of self-based fear. People mistake fear for natural instincts that we have neglected and are slowly losing in the "progress" of civilization. Sensing when it is going to rain is an instinct. Being paranoid that a stranger that looks different than you is going to jump you is fear. There is a difference.


Fear even imitates other emotions that are actually loyal to us, smearing their names and making us FEAR them. Oh, look at that.
For instance anger. Anger is a legitimate emotion evoked in defense of the fundamental self in light of being faced with some injustice. Anger is not just punching random things when you are overwhelmed with life. That's fear for loss of control.


What good comes out of fear? I mean sure, if you look at community based fear we have all sorts of good things. Protecting family and friends, building communities, having an understanding for those who are also trying to protect their families and friends. All of that adds up to a general increase in the overall quality and of human life, or really, life in general.


But we don't run on community based fear. We run of a personal, self-based fear that is all about survival of the individual over the whole. So we get paranoia, distrust, misunderstandings and assumptions. Those lead to an ignorance of other people's situations/culture/beliefs/intent etc. Ignorance breeds apathy.


Apathy means a lack of compassion and understanding or general interest in the well-being of others. With this severe emotional distancing, wars can be happening, and nobody really cares. So you get a whole lot of death, debt and lack of interest in anyone's well-being, and only individuals survive, because that is the goal.


Now, I'm not saying that community based fear is great, but I'm saying it's still a step up from where we are at right now. So if we went from self-based fear to community-based fear, we could make some serious improvements. From there we could try to implement a respect-based system-- that is once people have learned what the meaning of respect IS. Uggh. But that is an entirely different story.


But you see, fear has an entirely different agenda outside of the fundamental self, and so it is not a loyal emotion. If an emotion is not loyal to you, how is it yours? So we see, fear is a contrived emotion. That isn't to say that it isn't real, I'm just saying that it is something that does not occur naturally in the core of us. It is an outside thing that is learned or acquired as a means or basic survival. Outside of that function it is no longer useful and only causes harm.

Substance



I wanted to be
an astronaut
a scientist
a musician
a combination singer/hairdresser
a sailor
a doctor
an adventure tourguide
... taller


I wanted to be real
Genuine in existence

absolute, actual, authentic, bodily, bona fide, certain, concrete, corporal, corporeal, de facto, embodied, essential, evident, existent, existing, factual, firm, heartfelt, honest, in the flesh, incarnate, indubitable, intrinsic, irrefutable, legitimate, live, material, original, palpable, perceptible, physical, positive, present, right, rightful, sensible, sincere, solid, sound, stable, substantial, substantive, tangible, true, unaffected, undeniable, undoubted, unfeigned, valid, veritable

being actually such; not merely so-called
I wanted to be exactly what I claimed
and be proud enough
that I didn't feel the urge to hide it.


Why does it seem so much to ask?